Impasse

See that blank space?
That is where my head is.
Or is it...?
You know how light/white is actually All COLORS?
Well...THIS is actually where I am now...internally.
EVERYTHING and NOTHING.
Mid-life crisis?
Nah...I have these crisis issues throughout my life so I can't chock it up to that.

I am referring to my art but it is not like I live in a vacuum(although, sometimes when I am working in my studio, it feels that way)...It IS EVERYTHING and NOTHING.
WHAT AM I DOING?
Certainly not saving the world...
Of course, I never really set out to do that.
I am intensely drawn to create, to MAKE, to use my hands, etc, and produce.

And so I start to analyze...
"Why Clay?"
Well, Clay drew me in with the touch of it.
The malleability.
The way in which it responds to touch ...but that is fleeting too...
The way it changes at different stages.
It is so responsive at first and then it is eventually DONE.

It is like Clay is telling me,
"I gave you a chance back there and you blew it...
You need to pay more attention to me when I need attention...
NOT when you feel like it...Miss Thing!"

Now, this starts me thinking,
"WHY CLAY?"
Well... As we all know(ceramic artists especially),
She/He is really tricky, that little Clay You-Know-What...
She/He lures you in and entices you and all while letting you see from existing creations what she/he is capable of becoming, as well as coyly letting you infer other future outcomes...
"If I could do that(for Voulkos, Karnes,Takeazu,fill in name of masterful artist....),
you might want to see what else I can do...Come on baby, give it a try, I dare you..."

A little slutty, no?
I mean, really.
And so for about 9 years now, I have let that little trollop in...
flirting with me, taking time away from my family, other interests,
exercise at times, giving me back problems... you name it...
And yet...Clay has thrown me a few bones:
Happiness when pieces please me visually.
Interesting discoveries that lead to more, heavier involvement.
Accolades and purchase from others that reinforce the direction I am going in.
The huge array of possibilities of what can be done with Clay...endless...

That "YOU-KNOW-WHAT" has me wrapped around his/her little finger and messes with me on a regular basis.
AND, I can't help wondering if he/she is keeping me from getting out there and meeting some NEW interest/medium/life interest...
If you are in a relationship already it's pretty hard to put yourself out there to meet others...
Just sayin'.
I mean, I feel like Clay and I have been heavily seeing each other over these nine years...
We have a history, wonderful memories, as well as knock-down, drag-out fights and really, it can be a little difficult...(exploring abuse and toxicity)...

I am in a strange place.
(As a fashion designer, I NEVER thought that I would leave....)
I consider myself an artist. I do.
What that means, REALLY, can be rather loaded...
But, is it time to explore other mediums(or even techniques, applications,genres) more seriously...
I have gone out on a few friendly dates while maintaining this "serious relationship" but I have continued to return to Clay...
I continue to knit...but not any serious fiber work...
Drawing, only to sketch pots...
As I type this, I have a sinking feeling...
Sort of like I am being a cheater even  revealing these thoughts...

Meanwhile...I won't likely be DROPPING Clay like a hot potato...
BUT... before I DIG in even deeper, I feel like I should put these thoughts out there
and ask the universe for thoughts, opinions, empathy?
I have always seen other mediums coming later in life...

Don't get me wrong... I don't want to work specifically with Glass or Metal....

I may want a "three-some" with them some day...

NO... it is more about remnants of my past...

Fiber, Textiles, Jewelry... perhaps... Drawing even...

And I really think I am just getting an itch that will be satisfied if I continue to explore...without abandoning...

Just feeling very "carpe diem" but also not sure I want to do play the field so much that I never have any real intimacy and rich relationship...

On that note... I will be going into my overheated(bisque is going) studio to
"hook-up" with Clay and see what today brings...
Please don't mention this to Clay as it may just be a phase and I don't want to rock the boat....

Sidney Swidler

Yesterday I was out taking a walk with Mike and I get a phone call that shows up as Michigan... I am thinking... WRONG NUMBER.
This gentleman introduces himself as Sidney Swidler... sounded familiar but wasn't sure why...
He tells me he is interested in this piece of mine on Etsy and that he really has been a collector over the years and a couple of years ago he gifted 804 pieces to the Crocker Museum and he is retired but he is still doing some collecting.
It sounded real and I agreed to help him purchase the piece and thanked him so very much for his interest!!!
We followed up on the telephone today as he completed his purchase and I had a long, lovely conversation with him about his decisions were made, especially the gifting decision...
He continued by telling me he has already sent a photo of the piece to the lovely lady at the Crocker Museum as they are to choose pieces from his collection to take when he leaves this earth( I let him know I truly hoped that was not in the near future...being in his mid-eighties, he had no interest in leaving yet.
Of course NOW I need to buy the Book!
Needless to say, this was a wonderfully cool experience and I could not be happier having met this fine, appreciative gentleman... so I wanted to share it with you!

Kansas City Clay Guild Teabowl National

Happy to be included in this show again this year!

"KC Clay Guild Teabowl National 2012"

August 17-September 28, 2012

Opening Reception is August 17th, 2012 

Thornhill Gallery • Avila University • 11901 Wornall • Kansas City, MO

BOOM!

Happy 4th.
These 2 were entered in the StarBrick Gallery Salt n Pepper show.

They are in!
Gala Show opening Friday July 27th 5-10 pm 
Starbrick Gallery 
21 West Columbus Street, Nelsonville, Ohio
in the Historic Square Arts District, one block north of RTE 33.
starbrick@gmail.com

Frustration with a dash of... Happy?

None of those last items worked out exactly as I would have liked...
The teapot is ok... but the texture is not my favorite...
I didn't love the glaze on the carved  cups and I drop one and it shattered while glazing... nice..
The bowl is the saddest... 3 places with cracks on the inside carving that did not repair when I tried.
Makes me cranky...
Frustrated.

I get little fissures too and if the pieces were glazed and covered with color and texture, it would not matter... Wabi Sabi and such.
BUT... my aesthetic seem to bring me back to these pieces that are glazed or slipped or sprayed with slip of various clay colors and the little "imperfections"(sad but true description) ruin the pieces for me... and others?
I guess I have to SUCK IT UP and go with my gut...

One thing I have been working with is spraying slip on the pieces and the finish becomes sort of sprinkle-y finish.
I may play around with layering, going forward but for now, the clean, dry, matte finish is the the closest to the the way the pieces look leather hard- my favorite time in the process.
Below are some quick shots or what I have pulled together for some upcoming competitions and recent pulls from the kiln with the  subtle sprayed slip texture...
The white pieces are stoneware with a porcelain slip, the tan salt and peppers have a red clay spritz of slip and the others have a porcelain spritz of slip...
The beginning...

Off to the Outerbanks tomorrow... LONG 8 hour+ car ride... I will take photos, sketch book and maybe some thrown pieces to carve down there... we shall see... 

New Developments

In the studio...

Do I have more growing to do?

Hmmm... This is what I got as a response to an app to a pretty high end show.
I am not sure what to do.
Do I react?
I want to see what was chosen, for sure.
I felt like it was a reach... 
but I WAS STILL HOPING FOR ACCEPTANCE.
Admittedly, I have a lot going on right now (outside of the work) and I do believe there is a reason for everything and yet... I STILL WANTED TO GET IN.
It would require booth development and outlay of funds and a lot of work and hours and physical exhaustion...
But I STILL WANTED TO BE ACCEPTED.
I do still feel that I have room to develop my surfaces and  feel like I am still vacillating between
not wanting to create work that is overly refined and "Perfectionist" and still allowing the detail of the carving not to get lost in too much texture... 
SO...I can't help but wonder if I was really ready to apply 
or
wonder if I should consider changing my direction.... 
AND YET....
I feel like I am still HEADING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION....
BUT if you can't wait for all of the lights to turn green to leave your house,
HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU ARE REALLY READY TO APPLY FOR A SHOW?
If I don't try, I will never know...
BUT  I am missing the CRITIQUE PART... 
Was it the actual work that got me declined?
Was it not high enough in terms of quality/craftsmanship?
Was it inexperience on my statement of shows I have been in?
Was the work not cohesive enough?
WHAT IS THE PROBLEM?
Would you guys consider giving me your thoughts?



 : Sorry, your application has been declined.

Dear JUDI TAVILL,

Thank you very much for giving our 2012 jury panel the opportunity to review your application for the ___________Craft Show. I am sure you understand how difficult the task is to select from so many fine applicants and especially to have to turn down excellent artists in an effort to create a balanced show.

Regrettably, they have not selected your work to be included in this year’s show. We greatly appreciate your interest in the < _____________ Show and hope that you will apply again.  Each year we invite a different mix of jurors, and their perspective and emphasis will be different from those of their predecessors’.

Sincerely,

____________ Director, ___________

Category: Ceramics
Artist: JUDI TAVILL

Artist Statement:

The human body, nature, and the world around me are inspiring to me. I am not interested in replicating but, rather, reinterpreting this in my work. My textile background ultimately informs the work as well. The process of creation and the manner in which I choose to work stimulates me creatively, allowing for investigation and exploration. I use several different natural clay colors and throw the form on the potter's wheel, then I proceed to alter and carve interchangeably. It is the synergy created during this hand-to-clay contact that is both meditative and energizing to my soul. The residual markings found in all of my forms, affirms the reality of how the human spirit remains part of the vessel’s creation. I am emphasizing the vessel as a sculptural vehicle but many pieces function. The location the piece comes to reside in will ultimately determine its scale and presence. These forms find harmony in environments from modern to rustic. This completes the creative process for me.
MANDATORY: Booth Description or Booth Image
Pipe and drape in clean,neutral fabric. Various table/shelving/pedestal style configurations with clean organic, modern approach.1 black & white(antiqued) enlarged image hanging with artist name. Overhead lighting track style and possible floor covering.
2011 SHOWS PARTICIPATED IN (Other than Crafts America Shows)
No retail/wholesale craft shows in 2011. The KC Clay Guild's Juried Tea Bowl National Show Kansas City, MO 2011

OF COURSE, in the middle of typing this, I get a phone call from a gentleman in Ontario who seeked me out to buy THREE of my vases as a surprise for a ceremony renewing the vows of his marriage after FORTY  years... and on MY ANNIVERSARY, no less...SO whatever I am told, I realize I can handle it... as all opinions and critiques are subjective, I presume! 

Tonight and tomorrow!!!

Not the best photos BUT....
You can see my work in the Gilbert's house and the Verma's house
on the Rumson Kitchen Tour tomorrow(see margin) and/or...


TONIGHT and tomorrow at Salt Creek Grill at my "vendor table!
4-8 pm tonight, 9:30am-3pm tomorrow.
Tonight there is 1/2 price wine!!!



PLUS...I am debuting my new jewelry!!!

A Little Taste of What Has Been Going On in the Studio

My Purple Hair...

Candy Dishes?

GO BIG or GO HOME!

Big Bowl Form

Nothing Like Waiting 'Til The Last Minute...

I am submitting these photos for the next 500 Teapots by Lark Books.
The deadline is tomorrow.
So I am submitting tomorrow.
The problem is, my printer is not cooperating.
It does not get it.
I need to PRINT OUT what is on the disc...
It says it right there in the instructions.
The printer EVIDENTLY does not LIKE instructions...
SO...Tomorrow(because I need one more thing to do tomorrow),
I will find a Kinkos type to print the images on the disc.
THEN, I will ship it off...of course... it is ENTIRELY possible
that the images won't be selected for the book.
In that case, I do wish I could receive constructed criticism
as to WHY???
But, ALAS, rejection does not come with explanations for these things...
SO... come January when they notify the applicants, If I am rejected,
I will ask for YOUR criticism. For now, I would like to sleep.

The Actual Press

Got back from vacation and I received my copy in the mail...
I know, "big deal", but just wanted to share...
Do you see it?

A little bit of PRESS...

I don't think this is what the cover looks like(I am waiting for mine in the mail)...
But, the lovely writer doing a piece on "art pottery' for
Cottages and Bungalows' May 2012 issue, asked me
if it would be alright to use my piece:















Well... of course I said yes...
That piece SOLD to a lovely lady in Denmark before the issue came out!
But THIS ONE is available... in MY ETSY SHOP!



















So feel free to CLICK away!!!

A taste of what came out of the kiln!

Still for sale!

Do you see the girls on the right?
Just a heads up! They ship!!!

Are you in a buying mood???

Terra Incognito's show is up!!!
ON LINE! AND YOU CAN MAKE PURCHASES!!!!
HERE under Coffee, Tea, or...?
Sunds Like a plan!
Check out how it looks:















Do you see my two cups????

Catching Up.

Well...
We are back from Whistler... Just adults...
No Kids... CRAZY... No sleep because we took a red eye and
I am in that exhausted buzz place right now waiting to CRASH.
It was a good break from the intensity of Pam leaving us...
Here are some of the snow board photos...
P.S. I am still with my husband of 18 years even though
I ended up having to wiggle down a cliff of sorts at one point!











































Additionally, the 8 Fluid Oz. Cup Show has uploaded all of the images...
My cup has sold but it is nice to see the whole show!

I also had 2 cups accepted into The Coffee, Tea, Or ...? Show
at Terra Incognito Studios in Illinois.
My cup even made the poster:



















Sadly, the correct spelling of my name,however,
did NOT get into the show... But... you can't have EVERYTHING!

I can't wait to get back into my studio but of course...
ther is laundry and errands and did I mention LAUNDRY??

Press

Press in the Two River Times today...
A local newspaper....
Cute article about 3 local female artists...
and on their website HERE:

My Dear Friend Pam

It has been a long strange trip since my dear friend was diagnosed with A.L.S.
a few months over 5 years ago...
I have posted about her several times ...
HERE you will connect to all of them...



















Many of you read about her years ago and commented...
I used to tell her... For a WHILE now, all she was able to do is move her eye slightly to
respond yes or no...
She had a will to live I believe and she held out for a very long time...
Tonight around 6pm...she passed on....
I say passed on because I believe her soul, her energy needed freedom from the
prison her body had become.
I mean it... this is what I believe.
This is what I told my sons...
My 11 year old was very visibly upset and very angry that this horrible illness and
end of life had happened to such a good person...
He told me he would get rid of all the pottery collected
and my pottery if it had happened as it would be too hard for him...
I told him.."No!"...Don't you see.?..
My energy and spirit is in each piece and the pieces from these
other artists hold some of their energy and ours from us choosing
to have them around us..."
I feel that we are all part of a bigger energy and God holds our energy....
(I could expound upon this concept but long story short:
I feel organized religion and explanations
in English or Hebrew basically describe -with a humanizing effect -what I am saying...
Therefore it all works for me.)
I believe Pam's energy will continue to be with us and is with me now...
palpable,even....I miss her too...
I have missed her for a long time.... I am sad. I am solemn. I love her.
I know she loves me too... she told me... I told her.
Remember to do that...it goes a long way...
Perhaps it goes beyond.

Keeping the ball rolling....

A few more pieces I have uploaded to Etsy!